just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
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