She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize