i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
