My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I want her autograph on my taint
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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