I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
