What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
