I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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