ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
