is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
