Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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