can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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