she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
