I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize