I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize