she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
