I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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