redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
