i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
