and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
