I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
