omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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