I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
