We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
