Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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