dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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