i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
