he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
