HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
