Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Randomize
