can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
You pole danced in your parka.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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