i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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