The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Randomize