seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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