we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Acid is not a monday night drug
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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