if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Farmville is her only friend.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
