we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
The beer is more important than you right now.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
my nose is crying tears of wow.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Randomize
