You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
my liver is dry heaving
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