I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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