so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
