I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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