What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
