he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
