he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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