we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
