I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
