what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
