chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
