You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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