Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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