So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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