is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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