i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize